a-to-z HEADER [2017] - april

When I was reevaluating my core beliefs and values at the beginning of the year friendship was still in the top five values.  Despicable me … I started to wonder why I still allow people into my life who add little and wipe their feet all over me.  Awesome me … I then wondered why some people give so much and ask so little in return.   There are people who enrich your life when they arrive while others enrich it when they leave. You know what I’m saying.

We tend not to think too much about the attributes of a good friend yet we allow ourselves to be drawn into another’s circle without, dare I say it, considering the cost.  Maybe it is because friendships are voluntary relationships and we feel there are no rights of expectation.

Friendships that have stood the test of time have attributes and  personality traits that I tend not to have.  They’re the white to my black and the serious to my silly.  To flourish friends need to be trustworthy confidantes and life companions who accept me just as I am.  Best of all they’re okay with my imperfections as I am with theirs.  There is a place of true connectedness where we are free to be our inner child.   Spontaneous laughter, open sharing and all emotions can be shared without judgement.  There are no awkward silences yet what silences there may be, are natural and comfortable.

Real friends don’t run out on us when we lose our ability to be a unicorn.

Friendship Quote

Friends sow into each other’s lives, hold each other accountable and they have each other’s backs.  I love to spend time with my friends, it’s my favourite thing to do.  In fact I will prioritise time with friends above a host of other activities.

One or two close friendships may be all we need if we are prepared to invest emotionally and time-wise; these relationships are worth nurturing.  In a world that assumes more is best, having 825 friends on social media can seem like we’re popular but in my experience friendship happens face-to-face, in person.

Nurturing genuine friendships takes more than an in-box message  every now and again and let’s be honest, all the “lol-ing” on Facebook isn’t the same as a face-to-face-bellyaching laugh with a friend.  C’mon you gotta agree.  Friendships exist beyond social media, smart phones and blogs.  Tangible friendship wraps its hands around a cup of coffee and is not bothered by smudged mascara.  Real friendship holds space for us in our tender moments when our vulnerability is on show, like a wilted rose on a rumpled lapel.

QP Divider

This month I am participating in the A-Z Challenge.  The challenge is to post six days a week during the month of April using a letter of the alphabet for each post.  My theme during this challenge is that of values.  You can find out more about the challenge here.

12 thoughts on “Friendship

  1. I have very few friends where I can go can weeks without speaking to them, years without seeing them, but when you do, it’s like you’ve never been apart. Those ones make up for the flight of fancy friendships


  2. For years I thought so many of my colleagues at work were real friends. That is until I retired and no matter how hard I’ve tried to keep up, most of them can’t be bothered. It’s been a real eye-opener. The most meaningful friends I can count on one hand. Perhaps that’s as it should be anyway. Great post, Linda. – Marty

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well said, unfortunately life and miles get in the way of some friendships, but when you have a solid foundation, a friend is always lurking in the shadows. Hope to see you again either in our country or yours. In the meantime, keep up enjoying life and staying well! Xo

    Liked by 1 person

      • Yay, hopefully we can catch up then. I’m so happy for her. I keep up the best I can with her on FB. She seems like a wonderful mum! I’ll keep my fingers crossed that we do see you, but I do realise how busy weddings can be, so I’ll work around yall at the time! Xo

        Liked by 1 person

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